How to deal with a break up - Getting over them or get them back!

After the break up

So you've just lost the love of your life and your entire world has crashed to a halt. Every time you speak with your ex, you find yourself begging, pleading and trying to convince them that if they gave you just one more chance, you can fix it. No matter how much you plead, your ex seems to not budge. That day has come where you have lost them. Or have you??

I've been there my friend! Having delt with my first love and loosing my wife and 4 children. I've also had ex's come back to me where i've later got over them and realised, they're not for me.


*STEP 1 - DON"T CONTACT HER FOR AT LEAST ONE MONTH!*

This is for 2 reasons, 1, you NEED time. 
Break ups are fucking savage and you're gonna be an emotional wreck right now. All you're gonna do if you contact her is beg and plead for her back. This is the worst thing you can do right now as it will make you look weak and unattractive. There is no amount of begging that will get her back. Also, there are so many things you need to be doing for you right now and need your full focus to get your shit together and be the best version of you, you can be. If you want her back. Commit to this 1 month rule and DO NOT contact her under any circumstances.

*STEP 2 - The Break Up Happened!*

Accepting the break up happened is the first step to recovery. There is a reason it happened. Your old relationship didn't work. Let go of it and accept that there is nothing you can do right now to change it. Besides, why would you want something that didn't work. That relationship is dead.

Remove everything that reminds you of her from your life. If you are sentimental about these, put them in a place thats hard to access. (If its photos on your computer a zip file for example). Put items in a boxed storage.

Don't spend all day in bed upset and thinking about her. Do what you can to not think about her. Instead of thinking about the good times, try to only focus on the negative things. Do not think about her sexually. If you are horny, anyone else but her right now.

*STEP 3 - STAY ACTIVE

Pick up some old hobbies that you used to do before you were together, if you cant think of anything, pick up some new ones. Go out with friends and socialise. Show her that you are having a good time and that the break up is not getting you down.

Signing up to volunteer at a charity, for the elderly or vulnerable is a great way to keep active AND you will be doing something good for people who really need it. Being active will help remind you about what you love about yourself, what you enjoy doing and will help you to get over her.